Episode 76

 me: Central Scheduling, how can I help you?

pt: My mom has an appointment this morning but we are going to be late. She had a rough time in the bathroom this morning.

me: What's her name? Let me pull up the account and see what time her appointment was.

pt: My name is Tina.

me: You're not the patient, so what is your mother's name so I can pull up her account.

pt: Mrs. Smith.

me: ...And her first name?

pt: Sally. 

me: Alright well it looks like she is scheduled at 845 with an 830a arrival. It's currently 840. How late are you saying you will be?

pt: We might not get there until about 10am.

me: If that's the case, we will have to reschedule. 

pt: But I am going to be there, just not until 10am. 

me: I understand, but there are other patients that are scheduled at that time. 

pt: She's in her 70s. She usually only takes 10 minutes in the bathroom but today she just couldn't stop going! She's been in there since 8!

me: I will have to call the department and see if there is a way they can still see her today.

pt: I was told we had to be there are 830 anyway, so you're telling me my appointment was until 845? Why'd they tell me 830?

me: They ask patients to arrive 15 minutes before their scheduled appointment so they can get registered and start the appointment on time. 

pt: Well she's been in the bathroom all morning just all kinds of constipated. We haven't even gotten her dressed! And if she's been in there that long I'm sure she will need a shower. It will take at least 45 minutes to get her showered and then it takes another 30 minutes to get there. 

me: Sounds like we should just reschedule then. It's going to be too far past her appointment time.

pt: No no no! I can get here there in 15 minutes! We'll be there by 915.

me: But I thought you needed time to get her dressed and it took 30 minutes to get to the hospital?

pt: We only live 10 minutes away so we can be there in 5 minutes.

me: I'm a little confused...but either way, you will be late. I will need to call the department to see if they can still see her today since they do have a full schedule.

*calls department*

me: The department said if you absolutely need the appointment today, they can see you. They said come over now but she may have to wait in the waiting room because they are going to try and squeeze her in between the other patients' appointments this morning.

pt: Well if we show up and we have an appointment at 845, why won't they be able to see us right away? Our appointment was first?

me: There are other patients that are scheduled for the rest of this morning. So, they will be seen at their appointment times.

pt: I don't understand. We were scheduled too.

me: Yes, for 845. The other patients have scheduled appointment times for later in the morning, so the department can't just kick their appointments off the schedule because you were late to your scheduled appointment time. That is why they said they will squeeze you in between other patients, but you just may have to wait it the waiting room. 

pt: I don't want to wait.

me: Then we will have to find a new time on a different day for the appointment.

pt: Fine. *shouts* MOM! GET YOUR ASS OFF THE TOILET WE GOTTA GO NOW!

me: I will let the department know that you are going to still come and know that you may have to wait.

pt: MOM! WHERE ARE YOUR PANTS! WE GOTTA GO NOW!

me: Alrighty well have a good day.

pt: We're on our way right now!! We'll be there in 45 minutes!!

me: